Y'all, I have another instagram account. It's affectionally known as "real life". I'll be the first to admit I can view and use social media in an unhealthy way. "Cute picture! She looks so happy. Wonder where she got that dress. I'd probably be happier if I bought that dress. I miss shopping. I need to go shopping. Oh GAP is having a sale! You gotta spend money to save money. Should I get coordinating dresses for the girls? If I do 1994 Olan Mills might call. But really, how is she so happy? Wonder how her skin is so clear... that Rodan and Fields stuff is convincing. Meh I'll just stick with the dress today." A glimpse into my brain is unsettling I know. As my husband used to say, "you are not well in the head". This was before we were dating so it's ok. I digress. As long as my heart is in check quite frankly I enjoy looking at beautiful photos of hippie children galavanting in the woods at dusk and enjoy posting the one good photo out of 72 blurry toddler photos.
So today I give you my instagram and then I give you the other 99.9% of my daily life.
Instagram Says: Toddler using her skills to climb on a tray table and pretend hand sanitizer dispenses goldfish. Wow my kids have great creative and for that matter physical potential.
Real life says: We are never above technology/TV to distract and we use it in way more than just "emergency situations".
Instagram says: One-year-olds posing sweetly for their 1st birthday picture.
Real life says: Diaper check on isle four. Taken seconds after the above 'gram. We spend approximately 0 minutes frolicking daintily around in smocked dresses. Take the dresses off IMMEDIATELY before they drool goldfish on them!
Instagram says: Trendy toddlers mean hip and put together mom.
Real life says: Most days this is the best we can do.
Instagram says: Wild and unruly toddler making terrible life choices.
Real life says: Wild and unruly toddler still making terrible life choices.
Facebook says: Awww Easter sunday picture.
Real life says: Wait you seriously gave your 15-month-olds 22 donut holes? I did. I really did.
Facebook says: Toddlers hugging really do make the world a better place.
Real life says: Most days hugs lead to tackles which lead to tears which lead to bribes like 22 donut holes and Daniel Tiger's Neighborhood.
Facebook says: Toy piano. Fire going. Stockings hung. Looks like a lovely Christmas.
Real life says: It was lovely in a Maisie-is-recovering-from-a-terrible-winter-cold-and-could-snap-at-any-moment-don't-you-dare-give-her-a-new-baby-doll sort of way.
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So next time you see a picture I post, just know that I probably bribed my children (and RD) with donut holes. ;)
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